A while ago I decided to make a radical change in my schedule. It was a hard decision but it allowed me to create margin in my day. And that margin helped me take back a little of the peace that had been lost in my life after our family went through a failed adoption.
My husband and I suffered the devastating loss of three adorable little people. We had planned on welcoming three siblings, all under the age of 6, to our forever family. I know, going from zero to three under 6 is nuts. But when God calls you to it, He truly does help see you through it. The problem is that after being in our lives for a year and a half, the adoption failed and the world as we knew it fell right out from under us. Mass chaos and grief entered our lives.
Sounds a little familiar, doesn’t it? A global pandemic can have the same devastating effect.
I vividly remember the pain of that final day together as a family. My heart had felt as it was being ripped into a gazillion tiny pieces and scattered throughout the universe. Grief washed over me like a tsunami, it was beyond overwhelming. It caught me off guard everywhere I went. I couldn’t escape it. The floodgates would open randomly and the grief would come tumbling out.
Humans should schedule more sanity breaks, don’tcha think?
I decided to take a nice long writing break to maintain what was left of my sanity. My blog and Facebook page had several posts that had gone viral at the time. I had finally made the successful transition as a secular author with a long track record of published works under my maiden name, to being published in the Christian realm under my married name. I know God was calling me to let it all go even though it had taken so much effort to get me to a place of “success.”
But I was a mess. I had nothing left to give.
It’s amazing how you can go through life with a plan, and then something comes along to shake your world upside down and you’re left with a whole bunch of emotions that you simply aren’t equipped to handle.
We know a little something about that right now with this Covid-19 crisis, don’t we?
In a nutshell, I was
stressed out. burnt out. And tired of doing all the things. Know what I mean?
When you’re tired of doing all the things, turn to Jesus.
Ever feel like you are burning the candle at both ends and it’s time to escape from the world?
The upside-down world that results from failed expectations can seriously mess you up unless you continue to place your identity in the King.
When we’re in those seasons we need to set aside a lot of things that fill us up, to simply rest in Jesus. We need to remember that we can claim victory in Christ despite the chaos around us in this earthly realm.
A wise pastor friend of mine reminded me that God often allows hard things for His glory, and that it’s ok to be authentic with the Lord about our disappointments.
And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.Romans 8:28
Don’t run and hide from the world when life gets hard!
At one point that’s exactly what l did. I escaped. Literally, I hid. In a closet, of all places, just hoping that in the darkness, the quiet and the peace I found there would transfer over to me.
For the record, it didn’t. Mostly because I chose a closet that needed some serious organizing. So I got out of the closet, cleaned it up, and then went back to dealing with life.
Life is not something we can really escape, despite our best Netflix binges, online shopping sprees, and chocolate splurges. I’ve tried. It doesn’t work. Sure it works for a little while, but before you know it, reality sets in and it’s time to face our problems again. Plus, you have to buy bigger pants if you go on lamenting for too long. And ain’t nobody got time or money for that crazy!
God created each of us for a uniquely beautiful purpose.
How often do we run from our purpose? We fill ourselves with so many “todos” when we need to pause and rest in Him.
Lately, my to-do list has been pretty empty. Yours probably has too!
There have been more opportunities for solitude and quiet moments to reflect. More opportunities to spend more time in the Word. Hopefully, you have taken advantage of this downtime a bit to just pause and lean in to hear from that Still Small Voice.
Embrace your new normal.
My favorite person says I’ve got my zing back.
I didn’t realize that I lost my zing, by the way. Or that I ever had any zing to begin with, if we’re being honest.
But zing sounds good, doesn’t it? Let’s all embrace our zing!!!
Have you figured out any good nuggets of wisdom in your trials lately?
Here’s what I have figured out so far…
I am still a work in progress.
I will always be a work in progress.
And guess what? You are a work in progress too!
We’re all a little broken and that’s okay.
Don’t let a chaotic world stop you from being all that God created you to be!
Embrace your calling. Work through your trials. Find people who love and support you. Celebrate your success. Grieve your failures. Learn from your mistakes. Share your truth. Let your wisdom bless others!
Be the special person God created YOU to be!
Invest time in God’s Word. Develop a deeper relationship with your Savior. Guard your heart and mind. Embrace the peace that comes from leaning on Jesus. Let go of your self-doubt and anxiety. Embrace being all that He has created you to be!
I created a 5-day grace challenge that can help you begin to unlock all the beauty that God made when He created you. You can sign up below or go here for more details.