Finding Joy In The “Why Me God?” Moments

why me God moments
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Have you ever felt like you were in the wrong place at the wrong time? I’ve had a lot of those moments over the years, but the biggest one was the day my car was hit by a man who was in a hurry to get to an appointment. His poor decision smashed my car together like an empty soda can and required the Jaws of Life to rescue me. It was an honest-to-goodness “pee in your pants” moment of my life!

But I wasn’t laughing.

Several years of intensive spinal therapy and over a decade of chronic pain has followed. That accident literally changed the course of my life.

I went from a bubbly gal who ran 50 miles a week, climbed mountains and jumped out of perfectly good airplanes, to an angry woman crippled with chronic pain, thankful she could get up and walk the 20 steps necessary to get to the bathroom.

Bubbly was not part of my recovery demeanor. Lack of exercise and a sluggish metabolism quickly banished skinny from my vocabulary and my wardrobe as well.

It’s amazing how one single moment can turn your life upside down, shake the very foundation you stand on and send you into a tailwind of chaos and self-doubt that rocks the foundation of your faith, if you let it.

We have to find joy in the “Why me God?” moments of life or they will destroy us.

Did you catch that part? You have a choice to make when the hard times come.

Have you ever spent time wondering “Why Me God?

The car accident was my second major Why me God?moment of my adult life.

My first big adult “Why me God?” moment was when I was almost raped in a third world country by a “close friend” of one of my (former) besties. I later found out he sat next to her in one of her grad school classes and she thought he was super cute, but she barely knew him. She said he was a safe person for me to connect with while I was traveling overseas. I’m beyond thankful God showed up that night and gave me a supernatural power to fight the date rape drug he had slipped into my drink. It was a terrifying experience, but God rescued me and I caused some serious momentary pain to a certain someone’s “down under” parts, thank you very much. Ahem, #sorrynotsorry!

Our “Why me God?” moments will destroy us unless we cling to Jesus!

My third major Why me God?moment was when I found out we couldn’t have kids. Infertility and grief hung around for years in our marriage, as month after month I peed on a stick and the hope was pulled out from under me one tinkle at a time. (Ha! I can now find humor in something that devastates me, that’s all thanks to our God!)

My fourth Why me God?moment was when I discovered they had severed one of my vocal chords when they removed my thyroid cancer. Hooray for no more cancer, praise the Lord for that gift. But a serious boohoo, woes me moment for the girl who loves to sing, believes she would be happier living in a musical, and lost her ability to speak words for over 3 months while the surviving vocal chords learned how to readjust and heal. (In fact, I still struggle. My mind and my voice don’t always get on the same page!)

The fifth, devastating “Why me God?” moment was a little over a year ago when the dream of our forever family (three siblings ages 2, 4 & 6) died after a wonderful year and a half of precious time together.

There have sadly been a few more major “Why me God?” moments since the loss of our forever family. But they’re too painful to discuss. Plus, God and I are currently trying to work out those pains together. I’m so thankful He’s given me some gifted, loving people to support me along the way.

We all have major (and minor) “Why me God?” moments in life. It's what we choose to do after they come that defines us. Click To Tweet

We get to choose how to respond each time those “Why me God?” moments threaten to take over our lives. I hope we choose well!

  1. We can lean on God and trust in Him, even when we literally have no idea what’s going on, or
  2. We can take a step away from the Lord and lean on ourselves to get through the crazy instead.

I’ve done a little bit of both throughout my major “Why me God?” moments, the minor ones too. I bet you have as well.

But I can certainly tell you that when I choose to lean on me, I usually wind up messing it all up! You too? I’m left feeling burnt out, anxious, exhausted and spinning on the hamster wheel of life when I do it all in my own power.

Lean on God in the disappointments of life.

When I choose to lean on God and draw closer to Him during my disappointments, I am filled with a calm and peace that surpasses all understanding.

“And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

Philippians 4:7

I can rest in the fact that even though I have no clue what’s coming next, I trust that He does.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.”

Proverbs 3:5-6

This life is filled with pain and circumstances out of our control, but we can still choose to seek joy.

“Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds,”

James 1:2

We allow tough circumstances to draw us closer to Jesus or drive us further away.

It really is a choice, friend. Whether you want to admit that or not. And let’s get real for a moment, our happiness is fleeting, it comes and goes, sometimes by the moment or the hour.

“When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought me joy.”

Psalm 94:19

But our joy in Jesus is long lasting.

“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.”

Romans 15:13

Through our pain and suffering we can find true and lasting joy in Jesus!

We need to surround ourselves daily with God’s Truth.

  • This world is our temporary home. (Hebrews 13:14, 1 Peter 2:11)
  • Each day we can rejoice that we have another day to live for the King. (Psalm 118:24)
  • Life is filled with hard stuff. (John 16:33)
  • When life gets tough, we can choose to find joy in our trials. (James 1:2-4)
  • We can live victoriously and rejoice in the blessings of being a child of the King! (1 Cor. 15:57, 2 Cor. 6:18, Gal. 3:26, Romans 8:14, Gal. 4:7)

Choose to live in the victory of Christ over your own selfishness. Choose to find joy in the King! 

finding joy in the why me god moments of life

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23 thoughts on “Finding Joy In The “Why Me God?” Moments”

  1. Hi Nicki! Your “why me” moments are transparent and empower me to claim God’s grace in the midst of my own. Thank you for this encouragement and thank you for selecting my post, “A Lamp, A Light and A Limp” as this week’s Salt and Light feature. Blessings to you!

    1. Thanks for your kind words Joy! And so happy to have chosen your post. It was such an inspiration to me. And thanks for that giggle moment too. I love the freshness and joy that you had as you shared your own painful moment. 🙂 xoxo

  2. Amen, Nicki!
    May we allow our hurts, disappointments, and pains to push us closer to Jesus!
    Love this one!

    1. Thanks friend. It truly is amazing how God keeps using our scar-filled moments to glorify Him and bring hope to others! xoxo

  3. Lori

    So thankful He is always with us, especially when we feel most alone. In the moments of why, I am so thankful for the peace He provides, knowing He sees the full picture. Hugs and love your heart Nicki. So encouraging my friend! He is using your experiences in a mighty way.

  4. Such good perspective. I don’t think people talk or teach about the beauty of struggle enough. I also like the tone. You basically tell us we have a choice. Very good post. Thank you for using your struggle to teach us. I pray you’re doing well today.

    1. Thanks for the kind encouragement Teri. I think people talk a lot about their brokenness, I think they just often forget that it isn’t about us, it’s about Him. It can get easy to forget that when we struggle. It’s a hard choice to make, but such beauty comes to us when we lean on Jesus. xoxo

  5. Why me, God ? Our intense griefs become a testimony for others who have been through the same. When I met you last year, I saw a bubbly, beautiful woman. I am so glad you are my girlfriend because I can connect with you. I have been through that first major “Why me, God” as well. God rescued me mightily.

    We are online missionaries because of my stories.
    They are unique.

    Love ya.

    1. Love you too my sweet soul sister in Christ. Thankfully the bubble has come back, even though the weight hasn’t left. lol 😉 Our stories make us into the women God created us to be. I love your heart for your own online ministry my friend and am so happy we lift each other up and are friends. xoxo

  6. I don’t know that I have been brave enough to ask “why me, God?” over the situation Ive faced for the last several years. I think that I am afraid of the answer. But this helps! Thank you!

    1. Awww, big hugs to you Aryn as you go through your trial. I think it’s okay to ask God questions, we just have to look in the right place (our Bibles) for the answers. Praying you see the blessing in your situation and continue to cling to Jesus. xoxo

  7. You have been through a lot. The fact that you are still hanging on is a credit to you and to God.

    1. It’s all Jesus lady. All Jesus! And we have ALL been through a lot. It just looks different in each of our lives. 🙂

  8. Well said! I agree that it definitely comes down to the fact that we choose how we deal with challenges. “Choose to find joy in the King.” Yes!!

  9. Wow Nicki! You have been through some storms! I guess we all have. But some seem to get harder than others. What a relief you can take your “Why me’s” to God. He is so gentle and loving. We don’t always get to see the answer to our why’s, but I’m so glad that our Father sees and makes a way.
    Thanks for these truths today. Ps- I loved Joy’s post too!

    1. Oh lady we have all been through storms. It really is what we choose to do after the storms come that matter. Blessings to you! xoxo

  10. Wow. Lots of wisdom here. Thanks for writing about such a needed subject. Joy is possible in Jesus no matter what. Blessings to you!

  11. Wow, Nicki, you’ve had quite some “why me God” moments. I’m so grateful that you’re able to share your hard fought lessons to encourage us in our own faltering moments. His grace is more than enough! Thanks for reminding me of that truth.
    Love you, dear friend.

    1. We all have hard moments, but I’m just so thankful our Jesus remains with us friend. xoxo

  12. I’ve had many of those ‘why me, God?’ moments over the years. I think it is part of the process of learning to understand that God’s love is infinite and life circumstances aren’t a demonstration of His love – but how He keeps us preserved during those times are. Thanks for sharing so transparently, Nicki. The sharing of our own struggles helps those who are also struggling – we are walking together.

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