Discovering Your New Normal

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A while ago I decided to make a radical change in my schedule. It was a hard decision but it allowed me to create margin in my day. And that margin helped me take back a little of the peace that had been lost in my life after our family went through a failed adoption.

My husband and I suffered a devastating loss of three adorable little people. We had planned on welcoming three siblings, all under the age of 6, to our forever family. But after being in our lives for a year and a half, the adoption failed and the world as we knew it fell right out from under us.

Sounds a little familiar, doesn’t it? A global pandemic can have the same devastating effect.

I vividly remember the pain of that final day together as a family. My heart felt like it had been ripped into a gazillion tiny pieces and scattered throughout the universe. Grief washed over me like a tsunami, it was beyond overwhelming. And it caught me off guard everywhere I went. I couldn’t escape it.

Humans should schedule more sanity breaks, don’tcha think?

I decided to take a nice long writing break to maintain what was left of my sanity. My blog and Facebook page had several posts that had gone viral at the time. I also had finally made the successful transition as a secular author with a long track record of published works under my maiden name, to someone who had made a name for herself in the Christian realm as a married woman. It was a hard decision to make, but I know God was calling me to let it all go.

The truth is, I was a mess. The idea of continuing magazine writing, public speaking, blog posts and all the other stuff on top of my normal ministry life seemed insane. I had nothing left to give.

It’s amazing how you can go through life with a plan, and then something comes along to shake your world upside down and you’re left with a whole bunch of emotions that you simply aren’t equipped to handle.

We know a little something about that right now with this Covid-19 crisis, don’t we?

In a nutshell, I was super stressed out. burnt out. And tired of doing all the things. Know what I mean?

When life throws you curve balls, turn to Jesus! Click To Tweet

When you’re tired of doing all the things, turn to Jesus.

Ever feel like you are burning the candle at both ends and it’s time to escape from the world?

The upside-down topsy-turvy world that results from failed expectations can seriously mess you up.

When we’re in those seasons we need to set aside a lot of things that fill us up, to simply rest in Jesus.

A wise pastor friend of mine reminded me that God often allows hard things for His goodness.

And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.

Romans 8:28

The pain of life is not something we can escape, even if we try.

Don’t run and hide from the world!

At one point that’s exactly what l did. I escaped. Literally, I hid. In a closet, of all places, just hoping that in the darkness, the quiet and the peace I found there would transfer over to me.

For the record, it didn’t. Mostly because I chose a closet that needed some serious organizing. So I got out of the closet, cleaned it up, and then went back to dealing with life.

Life is not something we can really escape, despite our best Netflix binges, online shopping sprees and chocolate splurges. I’ve tried. It doesn’t work. Sure it works for a little while, but before you know it, reality sets in and it’s time to face our problems again.

God created each of us for a uniquely beautiful purpose.

How often do we run from our purpose, on top of all our problems? Been there, done that and have the wasted time to prove it!

We fill ourselves with so may “todos” when we simply should be resting in Him.

Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls.

Matthew 11: 28-29

Lately, my to-do list has been pretty empty. Yours probably has too!

There have been more opportunities for solitude and quiet moments to reflect. Hopefully, you have taken advantage of this downtime a bit to just pause and lean in to hear from that Still Small Voice.

God gifted me with the ability to use my words to inspire others. I haven’t been using that gift to the fullness of my abilities for valid reasons. But in every season there comes a time where you need to take a step forward and work on closing the chapter behind you to embrace the one set before you.

Embrace your new normal. Whatever that might be.

There comes a time where we must embrace our new normal and live out who He created us to be. It can be scary. But it’s worth taking that leap of faith.

My favorite person says I’ve got my zing back.

I didn’t realize that I lost my zing, by the way. Or that I ever had any zing to begin with, if we’re being honest.

But zing sounds good, doesn’t it? Let’s all embrace our zing!!!

Have you figured out any good nuggets of wisdom in your trials?

Here’s what I have figured out so far…
I am still a work in progress.
I will always be a work in progress.
And guess what? You are a work in progress too!

We’re all broken and damaged and in desperate need of a Savior.

We're all broken and damaged and in desperate need of a Savior. Click To Tweet

I guess we’re all in this proverbial “life” boat together. That’s a bit more comforting, isn’t it?

Don’t let a topsy-turvy world stop you from being all that God created you to be!

Embrace your calling. Work through your trials. Find people who love and support you. Celebrate your success. Grieve your failures. Learn from your mistakes. Share your truth. Let your wisdom bless others!

Be the special person God created YOU to be!

Invest time in God’s Word. Develop a deeper relationship with your Savior. Guard your heart and mind. Embrace the peace that comes from leaning on Jesus. Let go of your self-doubt and anxiety. Embrace being all that He has created you to be!

I know, it’s easier said than done, especially when life feels upside down. But we can do this!

Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.  Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 4: 6-7

The Salt & Light featured blogger is…

I love this post from Erin from “Raise Your Sword.” I love her thoughts about how to find God’s presence in our chaos. She ponders “When our normal routine and way of life are turned upside down we’re left scrambling trying to make adjustments. Our days just got a lot more weighted, and our world is bursting at the seams of chaos and questioning. Where is God in all this? Where is God’s presence in the middle of this storm?”

<< Read more about embracing peace in the chaos. >>

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10 thoughts on “Discovering Your New Normal”

  1. Thank you for sharing your heart and encouraging us Nicki! Only Jesus really can fulfill our hearts and help us face life’s challenges. Praise God we have a wonderful Saviour who always embraces us ?

  2. Roger W. Mateer

    I hate the phrase “new normal” almost as much as I hate “God often allows hard things for His goodness.” The first phrase is because my new normal sometimes last less then a week. The reason I hate the second phrase is because I believe that our loving God doesn’t allow hard, or, bad things happen to us. Instead he tells us the easy way to do something and like all little kids we, me included, we try to do things our own way. When we feel we need to sit down,like you did, and see why we insist on doing things the hard way and why we don’t listen to our loving father.

    1. Yes! I don’t like that second mentality either. And you are right, new normal is also annoying, but I think as our lives ebb and flow it often fits what we are living through. Out with the old, and in with the new…. normal! lol 🙂

  3. This right here, Nicki –> ‘It’s amazing how you can go through life with a plan, and then something comes along to shake your world upside down and you’re left with a whole bunch of emotions that you simply aren’t equipped to handle.’

    Yes, yes, yes.

    Been there done that, more times than I would have liked. Your story matters and it makes a difference, friend. Bless you in this difficult season …

    1. Awww, what a sweet note. Thanks. I know we have all been there and done that, but boy it doesn’t make it any easier the next time it rolls around, does it? So thankful we have Jesus! xoxo

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